Movies – Zachary Mule

DON’T SAY IT

(WHAT EXIT FILMS/DON’T SAY IT MOVIE, LLC/FILMPOOL FILMS (96 minutes; Unrated); 2024)

Some movies whisk you away with grand gestures and fairy-tale romances. DON’T SAY IT does the opposite – it sits you down at a wobbly diner booth, pours you a cup of coffee, and reminds you that love is just as beautiful in the small, imperfect moments of everyday life.

DON’T SAY IT (RICH GROSSO, JOE PACHECO, PJ MARINO, VICTORIA KELLEHER) (publicity still)

Directed by Stephen Ward, this 2024 romantic dramedy isn’t about dazzling meet-cutes or sweeping declarations. Instead, it follows Pat Leone (Rich Grosso) and Lara Doyle (Victoria Kelleher) – two middle-aged, battle-worn souls trying to navigate life after disappointment. Pat, once a dreamer with ambitions of running his own restaurant, now slings sandwiches at his brother’s deli. Lara, a sharp-witted waitress, has long since traded romance for routine. They meet, they hesitate, they laugh, and – ever so cautiously – they begin to hope.

Love, Served with Extra Cheese.

DON’T SAY IT (RICH GROSSO, VICTORIA KELLEHER) (publicity still)

What makes DON’T SAY IT special is its affection for the messy, unpolished side of romance. Pat woos Lara not with flowers or poetry, but with his signature Italian chicken dish, a secret recipe that somehow tastes better when shared. Their dates aren’t candlelit affairs – they’re impromptu karaoke nights where off-key renditions of ‘80s love songs become the soundtrack of something real. And that’s where the magic lies. This film doesn’t chase perfection; it embraces the awkward, endearing, and deeply human ways people find each other.

DON’T SAY IT (RICH GROSSO) (publicity still)

The supporting cast adds richness without ever stealing the spotlight. Joe Pacheco plays Pat’s no-nonsense brother, embodying the kind of tough love that comes with decades of shared history. Tony Denison as Doctor Michael Bernardi offers sage advice with just enough mischief to keep things interesting. These aren’t just side characters – they feel like people you know, voices from the past nudging Pat and Lara toward happiness.

DON’T SAY IT (VICTORIA KELLEHER) (publicity still)

Music plays a quiet but essential role in DON’T SAY IT. The karaoke scenes aren’t just for laughs; they’re symbolic of the film’s entire message – sometimes, you have to make a fool of yourself to find joy again. And when Lara finally joins in, singing just a little too loudly, you can’t help but root for them both. This film is more than a love story. It’s a reminder that life doesn’t end at 40, 50, or beyond – that dreams can be resurrected, that laughter and love can still surprise you, and that sometimes, the best thing you can do is take the microphone and sing off-key.

DON’T SAY IT (RICH GOSSO, VICTORIA KELLEHER) (publicity still)

If you’re looking for something loud and flashy, this isn’t your movie. But if you want a film that feels like an old friend, warms you from the inside out, and leaves you believing in second chances, then grab a plate of Italian chicken and press play.

THE MAGIC REINDEER: SAVING SANTA’S SLEIGH

(KALEIDOSCOPE HOME ENTERTAINMENT/ANIMA VITAE/CINEMAKER/ULYSSES FILMS/MOETION FILMS (85 minutes; Rated G); 2024)

THE MAGIC REINDEER: SAVING SANTA’S SLEIGH is a festive, feel-good adventure that adds fresh energy to holiday storytelling. Niko, voiced charmingly by Pauli Halonen, is a young reindeer bursting with ambition and warmth. Halonen’s voice performance brings an endearing sincerity to Niko, who dreams of joining Santa’s elite Flying Forces like his father. Yet, the holiday season isn’t without surprises: When the spirited Stella arrives, Niko faces unexpected competition that pushes him to new limits.

THE MAGIC REINDEER: SAVING SANTA’S SLEIGH (screenshot)

What makes this film stand out is the depth of its wintery world and the vivid sense of holiday magic it conjures. The filmmakers have crafted a setting that’s both enchanting and rugged—a snow-covered North teeming with icy landscapes, cozy cabins, and hidden challenges. Every scene feels like a winter wonderland, adding a magical atmosphere that young audiences will find captivating.

The real twist, however, comes when Santa’s sleigh is stolen – a high-stakes moment that catapults Niko and his friends into a daring, fast-paced journey. The film balances humor and suspense expertly; scenes where Niko and his friends dodge ice caves and snowstorms are exciting, yet there’s a heartwarming undercurrent of friendship and teamwork.

THE MAGIC REINDEER: SAVING SANTA’S SLEIGH also delves into some heartfelt messages that resonate beyond holiday cheer. Through Niko’s journey, kids and adults alike are reminded of the value of resilience and how, sometimes, the biggest dreams require us to face unexpected challenges. The dynamic between Niko and Stella is particularly refreshing, showing a friendly rivalry that ultimately leads to mutual respect and collaboration.

With vibrant animation, a fun soundtrack, and themes that go beyond typical holiday fare, THE MAGIC REINDEER: SAVING SANTA’S SLEIGHh delivers a memorable adventure wrapped in holiday warmth. It’s a Christmas classic in the making, perfect for families looking for a tale that’s equal parts exciting and heartwarming.

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies | Kasey Lehmkuhl | November 18, 2024 | Adventurous Children's Movie Christmas Computer Animation Family Movie Heartwarming Holiday Movie Movies Rated G THE MAGIC REINDEER THE MAGIC REINDEER: SAVING SANTA'S SLEIGH

ENO

(FILM FIRST COMPANY/TIGERLILY PRODUCTIONS (85 minutes; Unrated); 2024)

It was absolutely NOT a predictable thing that Brian Eno would ever agree to having a documentary film made about him; he’s on record as stating that he hates most musician biopics, and he has little interest in discussing or examining his own past. But when director Gary Hustwit approached the wunderkind artist/producer/lecturer/thinker/modern philosopher about a project in this realm, it was NOT the ordinary pitch. Hustwit had already worked with Eno on his previous film RAMS, a documentary about influential German designer Dieter Rams, for which Eno did the score. Hustwit had already been working on ideas for a “generative” approach to filmmaking, a way for film to NOT always be the same when watched. In the pamphlet handed out for his film about Eno, very useful in understanding the project, he says this: “When everything went digital, both filmmaking and exhibition, this constraint of a film having to be the same every time or having to be a fixed piece of art was gone. So I reached out to my friend Brendan Dawes, this amazing digital artist and creator who I’d known for 15 years. And he was game to try… First we started experimenting using all the raw footage from RAMS, including Brian’s music. We both realized that Brian would be the perfect subject for a generative documentary and ended up showing Brian a demo using the RAMS footage. He was excited to get involved. I don’t think he was excited about having a documentary about himself, but I think he was excited about the possibilities around the generative film system.”

It goes without saying that there was going to be tons and tons of potentially interesting footage of Eno’s artistic odyssey from which Hustwit could draw to make his experimental doc. You’re talking about the guy who was a founding member of glam rock pioneers Roxy Music, the groundbreaking artist who made crazily inventive albums like HERE COME THE WARM JETS and ANOTHER GREEN WORLD in the mid ‘70s, the man who gave a name to and contextualized the fresh new genre called ambient music, the groundbreaking producer who put his name on some of the most important albums to emerge in the ‘70s and ‘80s by artists like Talking Heads, David Bowie, U2, James, Coldplay and many more; the guy who began creating unprecedented changing light sculptures and exhibitions throughout the world, and a truly visionary creative “philosopher” and thinker who raised many significant questions about the purpose of art, and the complex nature of the world’s problems, and how we should try to think about solving them. Brian Eno is easily one of the most influential artists in music history, and has had a hand in more things than most people might realize. Did you know, for example, that his collaboration with David Byrne, MY LIFE IN THE BUSH OF GHOSTS, was one of the first records to use sampling, and that it influenced many early hip hop artists? That he composed the Microsoft Windows startup theme in the early days of the internet? And that despite the early scorn that some critics heaped on ambient music back in the ‘70s, the genre became a truly significant phenomenon by the late ‘90s, and exploded into new relevance during the pandemic. It is now inescapable throughout the world, and is closely married to the world of film scoring, giving Eno regular work in that realm with projects such as FOR ALL MANKIND, THE LOVELY BONES and Michael Mann’s HEAT. So it would be a daunting task for ANY filmmaker to put a doc together on Mister Eno. But it sure helped that Eno gave Hustwit hundreds of hours of rare, often never before seen footage to utilize and that the generative program he developed was able to ensure that no showing of the “final” film would be the same as any other showing. Weird and unprecedented, eh?

ENO (BRIAN ENO) (photo credit: CECILY ENO)

Screenings of ENO have sold out in most cities where it is shown, and I wondered if I would ever have the opportunity to experience it. But when the Speed Art Museum in Louisville announced a single screening of the movie, my chance arrived. And wow, was it a fascinating, often breathtaking event! Each version of the film is set up with little technological “triggers” that cause certain other sequences to come up next, without filmmaker or audiences knowing what that will be. The film itself contains these transitional “indicators” that let the viewer know a change is about to happen. So yes, you might get some special footage of the early days of Roxy Music, like I saw in MY version of the film, with the glammed-up Roxy boys singing “Virginia Plain” and showing what absolute originals they were. But you might NOT. And even if you are thrilled to see the footage, it’s gonna end before you’ve had your fill, probably. Up next? Will it be Eno’s early video for “Seven Deadly Finns?” Something featuring Laurie Anderson? A discussion of “Oblique Strategies” and how Eno used them to work with David Bowie on his “Berlin Trilogy?” YES, to those latter two things for the version I saw. We get to learn all about the formation of the specialized deck of cards intended to help break creative stalemates. Eno talks about how he and Bowie drew conceptually opposing cards when they were recording the track “Moss Garden” on HEROES. Wryly, we see David Byrne reading a couple of simple cards, and Byrne is featured prominently in a discussion of MY LIFE IN THE BUSH OF GHOSTS. Not much about Talking Heads, however, which was disappointing. But there is a lengthy and amusing segment on U2 and some of the tension that had to be worked through during the production of THE UNFORGETTABLE FIRE, and in particular the song MLK.

I was perhaps most delighted by the amount of talking we get to experience Eno doing, such as his discussion of “why we like music” and how ultimately most humans are driven by “the need to feel you belong.” And about how he tended to always question his own habits, asking the enduring question, “What if we DON’T do it that way?” That ends up having relevance not only for music, but for complicated moral and technological issues as well. My version of the film featured a lot of footage of Eno in his garden, talking about the influence of the natural world on his music, and how what became known as “ambient” was the result of Eno wanting to create a “place” and “inhabitants” and changing movement in his sonic creations. He demonstrates some sound-building efforts in his studio, and I was riveted by these scenes. “I want a sky,” he says of one evolving composition. “What ELSE do I want in this world?” He discusses his enduring interest in “more and more complex and beautiful things,” and shows us his plethora of detailed notebooks that he’s been keeping for decades, to help organize and capture “new ways of explaining things.” And frequently there are memorable scenes such as when the legendary producer admits to breaking down in tears during the creation of the track “Spirits Drifting,” as it came about during a terrible period of insecurity when he was certain he was wasting money on expensive studio time and did NOT have (seemingly) the ideas or impetus to get anything finished.

Wow, that happened to ENO? The guy who has finished more groundbreaking projects and fresh ideas than arguably anyone else in the industry, over time? So, there are indeed some cool revelations like that as well as plenty of music, discussions about art and the problem of being a morally concerned citizen of Planet Earth. We have some options for making things better, Eno says, but we also may just screw it up in the end. My piece here summarizes what I got to experience at this particular screening, but if you are lucky enough to see the film somewhere at some time, you may catch completely different segments. At any rate, for any fan of the truly legendary Eno, this film is a must-see. No, it is likely NOT going to be a comprehensive overview of his whole career, and as my companion pointed out, some may be bothered by the lack of narrative consistency or “arc” in this experimental movie. But boy, I ate it up. And I can hardly wait to see a bunch more versions of the film, should I get that chance.

DO THE ARCHITECTURAL WATUSI HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies | Kevin Renick | October 23, 2024 | Ambient Music Brian Eno David Bowie David Byrne Dieter Rams Documentary Experimental Filmmaking Experimental Music Gary Hustwit Generative Movies Louisville Kentucky Movies Music Documentary Rock and Roll Roxy Music Soundtrack Music Speed Art Museum Talking Heads U2

CHILDREN OF THE PINES

(TOPBOX PRODUCTIONS/DAME MEDIA/MIDNIGHT JUSTICE FILMS/FREESTYLE DIGITAL MEDIA (92 minutes; Unrated); 2024)

If a title like CHILDREN OF THE PINES makes you anticipate a horror film about cherubic baddies along the lines of CHILDREN OF THE CORN or CHILDREN OF THE DAMNED, well, that’s understandable. Any cinematic outing that focuses on “Children of, well anywhere or ANYTHING,” is bound to be a less than wholesome look at youngsters that are probably up to no good. But writer/director Joshua Morgan’s nifty little thriller has far more substance than your average horror film, and while it DOES have some horror in it for sure, it’s more properly termed a “dark melodrama” than a straight horror film. And in both its pacing and the deliberate way its script unfolds, this is one cleverly made and genuinely unsettling little film. It kept me very interested, despite my initial low expectations, and that’s saying something.

CHILDREN OF THE PINES (DAVID RAIZOR, DONNA RAE ALLEN) (screenshot)

College girl Riley (Kelly Tappan) has been through some troubling issues with her parents Kathy (Danielle J. Bowman) and John (Richard Cohn-Lee), and is less than enthusiastic about visiting them on a winter break at their home in an unnamed mountain town. In a curious bit of voiceover narration, she tells us “Sadness will only ground you, in ways that happiness can only dream of doing.” Nicely open-ended, that. We quickly learn that the parents have a few secrets, one of which is that they’ve provided employment for Riley’s ex, Gordon (Vas Provatakis). That’s annoying enough for our heroine, who is trying to maintain cordial relations with her former beau. But when it becomes clear that the folks have called upon the services of a cult-like organization that uses, shall we say, “unconventional methods” to facilitate healing for this troubled family, things start to get weird. Especially when some creepy young children are suddenly in the mix, and Riley is supposed to welcome them with “mothering” arms. Where did they come from? And what in the world makes Kathy and John think Riley is gonna be okay with these odd young’uns, one of whom is clearly not quite right in the head? The film’s primary tension comes from how Riley tries to manage each new bit of information thrown at her, and figure out what in hell her parents are up to. And possibly the old beau as well. The film impressively takes its time setting the tableau for this series of events, and while most of us have seen enough disturbing horror films to expect certain lousy things to happen in a story such as this, Joshua Morgan reveals himself to be a thoughtful, psychologically tuned-in kinda filmmaker. Issues of alcoholism, domestic abuse and estrangement are brought up, but nothing is driven to extremes the way you might expect. This is a character drama, one in which you get to observe these folks’ behavior yourself, and try to figure shit out right along with Riley.

CHILDREN OF THE PINES (KELLY TAPPAN) (screenshot)

And let’s talk now about Kelly Tappan’s performance here. Some of the first notes I wrote down while watching this were “terrific acting” and “totally naturalistic scene in the diner,” that being a conversation between Riley and Gordon as they get reacquainted before some of the more disturbing stuff happens. Tappan manages to do something all too rare in movies these days: Convince you that this girl exists and is genuinely like people you might know in her reactions and comments. Without being shrill or over the top, she lets you know she is truly concerned about her family and is trying to figure out what to do. When the moment comes where she has “had enough,” you’re totally with her all the way. It’s a marvelous, nuanced performance by this young actress. Her mom, Bowman’s role, is also impressive although I often wonder WHY a seemingly intelligent, thoughtful woman like this would go along with some clearly deranged behavior from her hubby. But then we KNOW this kinda shit happens today, don’t we?

The behavior of the cult that Riley’s parents are being guided by has some serious resonance with stuff we know is going on today, and one of the cult’s reps, the energetically cracked Lorelei (Donna Rae Allen) is believable in a downright icky way. I consider it a small miracle that director Morgan shows so much restraint in this production when he could have cheerfully gone much more over the top. And let it be said that while there IS some shocking violence in the film’s final third, it does NOT go over the top or push the limits. Events stay just on the right side of plausibility, which is disturbing unto itself. And the acting is naturalistic to a fault. The whole cast here impressed me, honestly. And the mountain setting is memorable as well… the film is visually striking, and you absolutely can imagine that all these events are actually happening in this little town. When Riley is walking through a snow-covered pathway, trying not to slip in her little boots, you feel every second of her effort. And you ROOT for her with every step, no doubt about it. That’s testament to Tappan’s anchoring performance, which I won’t soon forget.

I could quibble about the ending, which I wasn’t that wild about, and I sometimes get personally worked up about dysfunctional family dramas, especially when the solutions bad parents seek are clearly bonkers. But there is something genuinely compelling about what writer/director Joshua Morgan has given us here. The degree of realism, the fine acting, and the disciplined script all indicate a filmmaker with loads of promise and the thoughtful nature to look at complex human dilemmas with plenty of empathy and curiosity. CHILDREN OF THE PINES ends up being clearly on the INTELLIGENT side of the horror genre, with a determination to avoid cliches and overused tropes as much as possible. I applaud it for that, and will be interested in whatever Mister Morgan does in the future. Not to mention the charming Ms Tappan.

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies Streaming Video | Kevin Renick | October 10, 2024 | CHILDREN OF THE PINES Cults Danielle J Bowman Digital Release Donna Rae Allen Dysfunctional Family Horror Movies Joshua Morgan Kelly Tappan Movies Psychological Thriller Richard Cohn-Lee Streaming Video Trailer Unrated Vas Provatakis

FITTING IN

(THE MOVIE PARTNERSHIP/ELEVATION PICTURES/BLUE FOX ENTERTAINMENT/TELEFILM CANADA/WONDALAND PICTURES (106 minutes; Rated R) 2024)

FITTING IN is a coming-of-age comedy-drama that dives into the sensitive yet under-explored topic of reproductive health, sexuality, and self-discovery. The film centers around Lindy, a teenage girl whose world is turned upside down when she’s diagnosed with a reproductive condition (Mayer Rokitansky Küster Hauser or MRKH syndrome) that derails her expectations of what a normal sex life could be. This diagnosis forces Lindy to confront her identity and pushes her to explore unconventional methods to understand her body and desires.

FITTING IN (D’PHARAOH WOON-A-TAI, MADDIE ZIEGLER) (screenshot)

What sets FITTING IN apart is its brave and open approach to topics often considered taboo. Lindy’s journey is one that many might find unfamiliar in cinema, yet it’s handled with both humor and empathy, making the subject matter approachable and relatable. The film skillfully balances moments of comedic relief with deeply emotional scenes as Lindy grapples with her diagnosis and the impact it has on her sense of self-worth and future relationships. The heart of the movie lies in Lindy’s quest for empowerment. Rather than succumbing to societal expectations or limitations imposed by her condition, she embarks on an exploration of her own body and desires, seeking to redefine what a fulfilling life looks like for her. It’s a bold and often humorous look at the lengths we go to understand ourselves, even when faced with obstacles that seem insurmountable.

FITTING IN (EMILY HAMPSHIRE) (screenshot)

Maddie Ziegler shines in the role of Lindy, delivering a performance that captures both the confusion and courage of a young girl navigating unfamiliar terrain. Her portrayal is both vulnerable and strong, making Lindy’s journey feel authentic and deeply human. FITTING IN is not just about a medical condition—it’s about growing up, challenging norms, and redefining what it means to be in control of your own body and choices. It’s a thought-provoking, emotional, and, at times, funny film that will resonate with anyone who has ever felt like they didn’t fit in or had to rewrite their own narrative.

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies Streaming Video | Kasey Lehmkuhl | September 1, 2024 | Comedy Coming-of-Age D'Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai Digital Download Digital On Demand Emily Hampshire FITTING IN Maddie Ziegler Movie Trailer Movies MRKH Syndrome Teen Drama

BODY PARTS

(SCREAMBOX EXCLUSIVE/SIDUS FILM PRODUCTIONS/DHL STUDIO/BLOODY DISGUSTING/CINEVERSE (104 minutes; Rated R); 2023)

The Korean (Heads up: There is reading involved!) horror anthology BODY PARTS (directed by Won-kyung Choi, Byeong-deock Jeon, Jisam, Jang-mi Kim, Gwang-Jin Lee and Wally Seo, but no information is given as to who directed which segment) offers a chilling exploration into the dark depths of cult-like fanaticism and personal vendettas. The film’s connecting thread follows a young reporter named Si-kyung (played by Kim Chae-Eun), who is hired by a detective known only as Mister Hwayoung to infiltrate a sinister cult-like ceremony by a group that worships a figure known as “the Father.” Each of the interconnecting stories focuses on a single cult member who must offer a gift in exchange for their release from their dread existence: The collection of a different body part by the five “participants.” Over the course of five different vignettes, the movie delves into the disturbing backstories of how each came to possess these individual body parts.

The film skillfully builds tension as it reveals the twisted actions that took place for these individuals to attain these specific body parts, starting with a story called “The Reek,” which leads to the attainment of a nose. Following is “Water Ghost Boy,” moving into the eyes. “exorcism.net” shows how Seon-min was able to acquire a tongue. Then we delve into “A Former Resident,” where Gyu-Hyeong was able to attain a torso. The story of what is unfolding with these gifts starts to become more and more in focus with the real motive of why the offerings are being delivered to the Father. When the young reporter is caught, she pleads to Mister Hwayoung for help, but he leaves her alone to face her fate. The betrayal leads to the detective’s own grim demise.

The narrative is haunting, with each character’s story adding layers to the cult’s ritual and its eerie allure. The climax, where the Father grants each member a wish to kill someone they hate, is both shocking and thought-provoking, leaving viewers questioning the price of revenge and blind devotion. The performances are gripping, with the cast (unfortunately, as with the directors, aside from the one exception above, there is almost no information about who played which part) delivering intense and believable portrayals of their tormented characters. The film’s atmosphere is suitably dark and foreboding, enhancing the sense of dread that permeates the story. Overall, the movie is a compelling psychological horror that examines the extremes of human desperation and the terrifying consequences of unchecked fanaticism. It’s a must-watch for fans of the horror genre who appreciate a well-crafted, unsettling narrative with an extra dose of gore, blood and splatter. BODY PARTS premieres on the Screambox streaming platform on July 30

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies | Kasey Lehmkuhl | July 27, 2024 | Anthology BODY PARTS Byeong-deock Jeon Gwang-Jin Lee Han Sang-hyuk Horror Jang-mi Kim Jisam Jo Woo-ri Kim Ahyeon Kim Chae-Eun Kim Min-Seok Korean Kwon Ah-Reum Movies Psychological Thriller Rated R Screambox Wally Seo Won-kyung Choi

THE MOOR

(NUCLEAR TANGERINE/BULLDOG FILM DISTRIBUTION (120 minutes; Rated R); 2024)

I’ll say this for the producers of THE MOOR, a spooky child abduction mystery story set among the bleak, forbidding landscape of the Yorkshire moors: They’re a patient lot. Where most films about hauntings or horrifying events usually do their dastardly “darkness of human nature” deeds in 90 minutes or so, THE MOOR takes its sweet time and puts you through two hours of gothic atmosphere and slow-burn buildup to keep you engrossed. This proves to be a mixed blessing, but you gotta admire first-time director Chris Cronin’s level of confidence and focus in sticking to a particular aesthetic to tell his tale of grim kidnappings in not-so-jolly old England. And while his film won’t command the attention of EVERY viewer, those that can appreciate a mystery story that unfolds more like a literary classic than a conventional scary movie with “jump scares” and shit, will find lots to get lost in here. And without any question at all, child kidnappings is about as terrifying as anything in real life gets… they HAPPEN, and often when they end in murder, which is the case here, the killers are not always found.

THE MOOR (SOPHIA LA PORTA) (Screen Shot)

This particular story begins when two childhood friends go to a candy store to pocket some goodies, with young Claire detailing to her pal Danny how her not-at-all smart plan will take place. When things seem to be taking too long, Claire goes into the store to check things out, despite the fact that the owner does not care for her at all, a fact she makes clear. Danny is nowhere around, and Claire is told that the little boy’s father came and picked him up, a blatant lie. The film then jumps to many years later, when the adult Claire (Sophia La Porta), still traumatized by never knowing what happened to Danny, is in conversation with Danny’s father, Bill (a haunted and credible David Edward-Robertson), who posits that the nearby moors may hold some of the answers they are seeking. Not sure at ALL why he decides this; would a vast unforgiving wilderness be where your average psycho kiddie snatcher would take his pint-sized victims to dispose of? Maybe; I know nothing of such matters. Anyway, Bill wants to investigate the dark and foggy terrain of the moors (a striking landscape that has graced quite a few mystery films through the years) with the help of a psychic (Elizabeth Dormer-Phillips) and an experienced local, Thornley (the great Bernard Hill, who played King Theoden in the LOTR franchise, in one of his last performances), who has maps of the terrain they are seeking to explore and familiarity with the entire nightmarish saga. Of the series of kidnappings that have terrorized the area, Thornley says “Normally it’s around about 10% of young people who leave the area they were brought up in. But since that summer, it’s been about 50%. Personally I think they just didn’t want to see that place out their window anymore.”

THE MOOR (ELIZABETH DORMER-PHILLIPS) (Screen Shot)

He has a point… once the film takes us out onto the actual moors, it’s about as unfriendly and brooding a landscape as you could ever hope to see. Miles and miles of marshy NOTHINGNESS, perpetually in fog or shadow, where you could take a terrible fall, get hopelessly lost, or encounter something you would NEVER want to see in your worst nightmare. The film counts on us being deeply unsettled by this unfriendly expanse, and primed for ANY freaky event or discovery that might take place.

Except… there aren’t that many of them. Suspense builds rather slowly, and there are lots of scenes of our intrepid investigators wandering around in the grim nothingness clearly out of their element, and having a few combative conversations about what is really going on. As a viewer, you may find yourself ASKING what is “really going on,” and longing for a clear denouement. Some documentary style interview segments, a la the BLAIR WITCH PROJECT, try to fill in a few blanks for us, and clearly the film wants us to be open to the supernatural elements presented here, even though we already know a man has been arrested for the child killings and may possibly be released soon. We WANT Bill to learn the fate of his child, and for Claire to start having peaceful nights again once she learns the fate of her childhood friend. And let it be said that the ACTING is uniformly excellent in this film; those Brits do this stuff with class and absolute discipline; you will definitely BELIEVE there is a mystery to be solved here. La Porta and Edward-Robertson are both totally credible.

THE MOOR (SOPHIA LA PORTA, DAVID EDWARD-ROBERTSON, VICKI HACKETT, ELIZABETH DORMER-PHILLIPS, MARK PEACHEY) (Screen Shot)

But how much of this will be “riveting cinema” to you, ultimately? That is a highly individual thing. I really was compelled by the setting of this film, the chance to see the actual MOORS for the forbidding landscape they are, NOT a manufactured landscape. And I also felt I was in the presence of compelling, worthy filmmakers throughout. But was I scared? Was I really keen on the ultimate conclusion to this strange saga? Not so much, frankly. I tend to like my “evil” made straightforward and abundantly clear. So I don’t think most of you will get that from THE MOOR. But as a quietly gripping look at a truly ongoing nightmare, with an imposing natural landscape as one of the clear “villains,” this film is quite powerful in its own way. The “moor,” the scarier. Or something like that.

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies | Kevin Renick | July 21, 2024 | Bernard Hill Child Abduction Chris Cronin David Edward-Robertson Elizabeth Dormer-Phillips England Horror Mark Peachey Movies Psychological Thriller Rated R Sophia La Porta THE MOOR Vicki Hackett

HEART OF AN OAK (LE CHENE)

(GAUMONT/CAMERA ONE/WINDS/KALEIDOSCOPE ENTERTAINMENT (81 minutes; Unrated); 2022)

There is so much that is rich and wonderful about this French-made nature film that I consider it a miracle that such a film even exists. It’s a “documentary” about the vividness of the natural world that has no narration whatsoever. It has all kinds of creatures scurrying around in its frames but virtually no “cutesy” music to accompany the movement of those creatures (with two minor exceptions). And instead of a panoramic overview of the wonders of Ma Nature that hops from setting to setting, this film focuses on the life within and around a specific tree. Yes, a TREE, in this case a gorgeous 200-plus years old oak tree that serves as the “heart” of the title. Can such a straightforward, unpretentious look at a portion of the natural world make for riveting cinema? Oh, you betcha. This film is a stunner.

Although co-directors Laurent Charbonnier and Michel Seydoux obviously had a clear vision of the kind of film they wanted to make, they needed a specially talented cinematographer to zero in on the minute details of this landscape and the critters inhabiting it that would hold an audience’s attention. And they sure found the right guy in Mathieu Giombini, who gives us breathtaking views of insects crawling on leaves, birds huddling together on a high branch or dodging a threat from a watching raptor, red squirrels running to and fro to fetch acorns or do a million other things, and tiny mice in their hidden underground homes, playing, trying to stay warm and watching at every turn for possible danger. Often in nature documentaries, a narrator will tell us what the animals are doing and how remarkable their survival skills are in a possibly unforgiving landscape. There was something so refreshing about watching HEART OF AN OAK and soon realizing there was NOT going to be any narration. Only stunning sequence after stunning sequence, accompanied by mostly subtle, evocative music that is almost always perfect. So we are free, as viewers, to just revel in the colorful and stunning imagery, and let our natural curiosity about, well, all things NATURAL, hold sway. It’s a gift from the amazing French crew that made this movie, and honestly one of the biggest surprises I’ve had as a film buff in a long, long time.

The giant oak tree that serves as the primary setting, does not prove to be limiting. We see what is happening in the upper branches of the tree as well as within the roots and below, in addition to the action happening in the general area of the tree, where deer and wild pigs are wandering (not to mention the omnipresent squirrels). We also get to see different seasons and weather conditions, with an extended rain sequence that is incredible. I can’t think of another film in this realm where you see raindrops hitting a patient insect in extreme closeup, or a family of rodents huddling together for warmth half hidden by leaves. There are numerous jaw-dropping sequences, such as a Northern Goshawk trying to make a meal out of a fast-moving Eurasian Jay, zooming after it through the forest like the speeder race on Endor in RETURN OF THE JEDI. I cannot for the life of me comprehend how this segment was filmed. Or how the camera was able to capture a slow-moving Acorn Weevil lumbering along a thin branch, allowing you to study every aspect of this photogenic insect in a way you’ll never get a chance to do in any other forum. And watching competitive mice fight over control of an acorn, like it’s a matter of life and death, conveys natural reality in a far more vivid manner than anything a narrator might say. It is honestly just a genius decision to dispense with narration in this film, meaning that there is no intrusive human voice, save for a somewhat questionable Dean Martin song used to accompany one rather vivid sequence of critters (mostly insects) getting it on and such. It’s sort of comical, I’ll say that. But the overall reaction I had throughout was absolute AWE, at the intense life force happening within and around a magnificent old tree. There are not many films of this “nature” out there, and if you are a lover of the sort of hidden wonders you might sometimes see on a hike in the woods, you’ll adore this movie.

The typical action movie will show the names of the stars in the closing credit sequence. I found it absolutely endearing that this film lists the many SPECIES of creatures we see here (yes, I’d been wondering) since they are, truly, the real “stars.” So that includes the aforementioned Acorn Weevil, which deserves some kind of award, the Wood Mouse, the Eurasian Jay, the Great Spotted Woodpecker, the Barn Owl, the Coypu, the badger and many others. The extreme closeups we get of every critter makes for genuinely awe-inspiring views of the secret world we are treated to here. I was never bored; in fact, I felt pure gratitude at the genuinely inspired choices this film makes. It made me even more of a nature lover than I already was. I recommend HEART OF AN OAK with no reservations whatsoever. At a time when we are seeing so much of our natural world destroyed or threatened by climate change. it’s good to have this in-depth, detailed reminder of the powerful mysteries and vital life forms that exist out there closer than we think, wanting only to do their instinctive thing, just as every one of us do every single day. Truly a stunning piece of cinema!

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies | Kevin Renick | June 18, 2024 | Creatures Forest French Film Giant Oak HEART OF AN OAK Laurent Charbonnier LE CHENE Mathieu Giombini Michel Seydoux Movies Nature Nature Film Unrated

THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK

(SUNRISE FILMS/VERTIGO RELEASING/LONE TOWER VISIONS/A BIGGER BOAT/ROUNOW PRODUCTIONS (90 minutes; Unrated); 2024)

One of the things I love about movies is the chance to experience something from a unique point of view, to live vicariously through a character’s actions, and maybe wonder if you’d behave in a similar manner or completely differently given their challenges in the story. There are so MANY movies out there, of course, that they tend to fall to well-worn tropes of plot development to hold your interest, and that can be tedious. I tend to really like films that show you characters in trapped situations, and to hold your interest by how they build the drama and suspense. A film I reviewed for ZM a couple of years ago was focused entirely on a young pregnant woman trapped in her car on a mountainside in a serious car accident. It was incredibly suspenseful, and when it turned into a horror film in the last half hour, the shocks were well earned. But I’m here right now to talk about THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK, a fairly ingenious little thriller that makes the most of its singular premise. Almost the entire movie consists of the plight and actions of a woman named Amanda Jennings (Katharina Sporrer) who has been kidnapped by an unknown baddie and tossed into the trunk of her rental car. We see a simple shot of her high heel shoes as she unsuccessfully tries to return the car at the film’s beginning, then the furtive actions of a stranger as he quietly gets in that same car without her seeing him. And next we are right in the trunk with her, her hands and mouth taped, trying to figure out what the fuck happened. Amanda has her cell phone, and that becomes absolutely central to the unfolding events. She is wearing a long white wedding dress, and she is a feisty, determined gal who manages to get the tape off her mouth and to call 911 on her phone. The detached sounding male operator asks her a series of increasingly annoying questions, including her location, to which she can only answer “somewhere north of Houston.” When she complains about his questions – after all she can’t give much info being trapped in the trunk of a car – he says “You’re under a lot of stress. but we’re doing all we can.” In the first of many small twists, it turns out the operator is, in fact, her kidnapper, She’s in the trunk and he’s the driver, and their “relationship” is going to evolve through a subsequent series of phone chats.

THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK (KATHARINA SPORRER) (Screen Shot)

So that’s the basic premise, and I gotta say, writer/director Jonas Kvist Jensen does an impressive job of giving us the claustrophobic feeling of being stuck in the trunk of a car, trying to figure out what to do. There isn’t much light, true, but Amanda finds a tool in the trunk that she uses first to poke a hole big enough to see out the back (ingeniously, this allows us to see what happens a few times when the kidnapper stops the car), and later to create an opening through which she can see the driver. In a good example of how cell phones can be used to help move a modern story along, Amanda even manages to snap a photo of her captor, who we’ll soon learn is an ordinary looking, middle-aged white guy named Michael Bellrose (Caspar Phillipson). I don’t think it’s necessary to spill every plot element here, as I think you SHOULD see this movie. But through a series of “games” and tense phone exchanges, we learn that Amanda is a runaway bride, that she and Bellrose have a connection to the same bank, and that getting ahold of her father on the phone turns out to be a key development. Bellrose’s intentions towards Amanda are a bit hazy, but he’s a seriously malevolent dude. When a good samaritan approaches the car offering to help Bellerose with something, the situation goes south in a hurry. And to my knowledge, this is the first cinematic example of a murder being shown to us via a hole in the trunk of a car. Generating even MORE suspense is when our psycho kidnapper tells Amanda she’s going to have company soon, and he slips a scorpion into the trunk through the main opening. This is filmed extremely well, with the critter crawling all over her and her having to maintain the kind of absolute cool that you or I likely would NOT possess. Scenes of this nature in so MANY films can be tiring and insulting to one’s intelligence. Here, it is a marvel of suspenseful pacing, and I wanted to cheer over Amanda’s believable actions. I also loved what happens when a good-natured female police officer stops the car and has a normal-seeming chat with Bellrose. Amanda has to listen to the dialogue without yelling out and risking her life. You’ll THINK you know how this scene is going to turn out, but trust me, you’ll be surprised. Some real thought went into this script and the necessity of getting from “point A” to “point B.” And if you are tired of thrillers and horror films where women either act stupidly or simply act as helpless victims, you’ll enjoy the plucky, sarcastic manner of the heroine here, and how she does her best to one-up the kidnapper mostly through dialogue. At most turns, this film avoids the obvious, which greatly impressed me. And whereas in the typical horror film (and THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK is ostensibly in that category) you’ll have to endure either an unpleasant or simply unbelievable ending, this cool little movie has a solid conclusion, almost cheer-worthy in fact. I found myself amazed at the end, and that doesn’t happen very often.

THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK (CASPAR PHILLIPSON) (Screen Shot)

My only criticism, and it’s basically a small one, is that while Sporrer is clearly a talented actress, her character rarely shows the kind of fear and vulnerability that I would think most women would display in her circumstances. She’s in a clearly desperate situation, and may very well be facing the end of her life, yet she always acts with confidence and resolve. It’s refreshing in a way, but wouldn’t it be more authentic if she lost her cool a couple of times? The “game” that Bellerose keeps her locked into, unwillingly, reveals her to be a more than capable opponent. And Phillipson is definitely a credible baddie, a blandly ordinary creep who insists he is “not really a violent man.” There’s a discernible vulnerability to him that again is somewhat refreshing, and the ongoing dialogue between him and our heroine is fast moving and full of interesting quirks. But overall, this movie is Jensen’s show; he deserves the bulk of the credit for how well this movie works as the writer and director, and I can’t imagine that many other films will be made that so successfully utilize the cramped trunk of a car the way this one does. So thumbs up from me on this surprising little thriller. It’s not flashy, and it’s mostly free of jump scares and the typical bloody violence inherent in this genre. But THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK is a minor miracle, a film that takes one of the most terrifying scenarios any woman could imagine and turns it into something riveting and even thoughtful. This movie beats the odds consistently for films of this nature, and I can only be grateful as a viewer.

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies | Kevin Renick | May 26, 2024 | Caspar Phillipson Horror Jonas Kvist Jensen Katharina Sporrer Kidnapping Movies Psychological Thriller THE GIRL IN THE TRUNK Unrated

HERE FOR BLOOD

(SCREAMBOX ORIGINAL/PAGEMAN PRODUCTIONS/BLOODY DISGUSTING/CINEVERSE (101 minutes; Unrated); 2024)

This is a horror movie that is aptly named, as it indicates that if you watch horror movies in hopes of seeing a lot of blood, this one delivers. Throughout the film, there is spurting blood from stabbings, limbs getting cut off and even a couple of outrageously over the top head choppings. So I am saying all that upfront so you know that bloody violence is the order of the day in this’un. But since it is billed as a “horror/comedy,” the undertone of absurdity and satire helps alleviate any revulsion you may feel about the killings, although I have to say, the first two were really rather shocking… they happen in the film’s first 15 minutes. But what’s it ABOUT, you ask? Well, there’s this wrestler guy named Tom O’Bannon (Shawn Roberts) who makes less than a good living from cheap matches that a sleazy promoter stages for peanuts. Tom isn’t happy about his plight but hasn’t much choice in the matter. His attractive girlfriend Phoebe (Joelle Farrow) has an important test to cram for, and she asks Tom to fill in for just two hours for a babysitting job she agreed to do for friends, who have a young daughter named Grace (Maya Misaljevic). Tom is anything but thrilled about this but reluctantly agrees. Problem is, the house has been targeted for sinister reasons by a band of psycho cultists. When Tom orders a pizza for him and Grace, the pizza delivery guy is slaughtered in brutal fashion, and then it’s abundantly clear something horrible is taking place. And when Tom investigates a couple of weird sounds, the mayhem begins in earnest.

HERE FOR BLOOD (MAYA MISALJEVIC) (Screen Shot)

That’s the setup in a nutshell.

HERE FOR BLOOD (JOELLE FARROW, SHAWN ROBERTS) (Screen Shot)

I don’t really think, in a low-budget horror film such as this, that you need either a detailed plot synopsis or an analytical review of how successful the horror tropes are. Most people watch horror for the visceral kicks a film provides and the overall entertainment value. We’ve seen plenty of films about home invasions by masked psychos, which is the deal here, but this movie seems to delight in a level of excess that definitely makes an impression. One of the dimmer of the psycho cultists, apparently named “Bernie” (Jesse Buck) gets his face held to a red hot stove burner by Tom, screaming his head off; he also gets stabbed a bunch and has a hand cut off. The way Buck screams and pouts angrily throughout is the first sign you should NOT take this movie too seriously. Performance-wise, Buck is over the top but clearly understanding of the TONE that director Daniel Turres is going for. Which is a kind of high-energy schlock-carnage. “We are under attack by a gang of sex perverts!” Tom declares to Phoebe when she finally arrives after her studying is finished. “Everybody grab a knife,” he adds. There are tons of knives in this film, and an axe or two, all utilized regularly. “Just chop!” Tom tells Phoebe when she is wondering how they are going to subdue one of the killers. Phoebe is reluctant at first to do any killing and seems pathetically unhelpful, but when a killer calls her a bad name, she does some chopping all right, to such an extent that Tom has to tell her she can STOP now. Blood spurting in all directions is all the evidence needed that one of the baddies has been taken down. I laughed at that scene, honestly. And I laughed even more when Grace’s parents return home; this seemingly innocuous but neurotic couple, played with sitcom-like dopiness by Tara Spence-Nairn and Michael Therriault, provide some of the meant-for-relief laughter in the film’s final third. Considering the grim nature of the intruders and the detailed butchery we witness, the presence of these two quarreling knuckleheads will either help you relax or annoy the shit out of you. It sort of did BOTH for me.

HERE FOR BLOOD (JOELLE FARROW) (Screen Shot)

The killers are part of a cult, naturally, preparing for some kind of “ascension” that involves both a disemboweled talking head (voiced by Twisted Sister’s Dee Snider) that keeps saying “Feed me!” (a la the plant in LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS), and the sacrifice of an attractive young woman, which is Phoebe’s intended role in all this and a point of attentive self-awareness and parody by the filmmakers, who score a point or so for that in terms of comedy. “We all knew the risks of joining a cult,” one of the homeowners casually declares. “But it’ll all be okay when we ASCEND.” Of course. That’s how it’s supposed to work! HERE FOR BLOOD is not a boring movie – it keeps things moving along at a good pace, and one or two setpieces of insane bloodletting, though winking at past films like THE EVIL DEAD and REANIMATOR, aren’t quite as deleriously funny as they’d like to be. The acting is not very good, for the most part, although the muscular Shawn Roberts tries to anchor things as best he can (and takes a thorough beating throughout). At one point, young Grace points to a bloody figure on the floor and asks “Is that guy DEAD?” “Yeah,” Tom replies. “Sucks, cause he was a fan of mine, too.” I laughed at that scene, and plenty of others. Clearly the intent was to have some fun with the genre by both the director and writer James Roberts. But it’s no classic, and much of the acting is just too stiff to be memorable. Still, it’s worth a watch for horror fans that like to be repulsed or startled by what they see. And I give the film an extra point or two by letting the good guys win despite going through hell. But many will perhaps NOT make it to the end of this one without a decisive response either yay or nay. But if you’re “here for blood” when you sit down to view this piece of self-aware horror carnage, chances are you will get what you came for.

HEY, MA! WATCH THIS Movies Streaming Video | Kevin Renick | April 27, 2024 | Action Movie Comedy Daniel Turres Dee Snider HERE FOR BLOOD Horror James Roberts Jesse Buck Joelle Farrow Maya Misaljevic Movie Trailer Movies Screambox Shawn Roberts Slasher Movie Unrated Wrestling Movie

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